Harnessing the Power of “I”

Mar 13, 2018 | Executive Coaching, Executive Presence, Interview Preparation, Public Speaking

Great Expectations. Bookish Scout Finch in To Kill a Mockingbird. Sherlock Holmes’s meticulous biographer, Dr. Watson. The resolute Jane Eyre.

A first-person narrator creates a sense of intimacy. We identify with the narrator and imagine ourselves in the story. You feel as if you are there, walking with the narrator. You see the world through their eyes. Thoughts, fears, opinions, and biases are palpable. Their perspective sticks with you. A first-person narrator sheds all anonymity and fully owns the story. 

Yet, as I prepare corporate executives for media interviews and speaking engagements, I often sense a reluctance to get personal… to become the protagonist.  There’s a certain anonymity in the corporate world – a feeling that you can wrap yourself in an impervious vest of corporate messages without having to offer anything of a personal nature.  Once that protective vest is donned, the reflex is often to default to jargon – words like culture, authenticity, innovation, and bottom line. Big puffy words that have lost their meaning.

I once worked with a group of scientists who resisted my efforts to pull out a personal perspective. They said, “We’re not the story. Our data is the story.” I insisted they take a harder look. They were the protagonists in their story, whether they could see it or not. Would we have pasteurization without Louis Pasteur, the theory of radioactivity without Madame Curie, or frozen food without Clarence Birdseye? One scientist – who was doing pioneering work developing technology to support urban farms – finally admitted that his father had owned a small grocery. The act of providing food to the community was part of his DNA, and that additional perspective ignited his story.

When the protective vest gets strapped on, my comeback is to talk about the power of “I.” Corporate messages are the frame of a house, but what’s your I Statement? Why do you care about the story? What part do you play in making it happen? How can we see the excitement of your story through your eyes, and your I Statement?An I Statement is different from, “You,” or the royal “we.”  When you say, “I” you own the story. You open a door to a more personal relationship with your audience.  You become that compelling, unforgettable character at the center of the story.

My I Statementis simple and I share it often. I’ve been fascinated by stories since I was a child – from Shakespeare to science fiction. I majored in English Literature (no surprise, right?). I love the power of a story to convey the human experience and to bring people together. And, I’ve spent my career helping others bring their stories to life.

The next time you do an interview, or present to an audience, think about your role as the first-person narrator, and take some time to craft your I Statement. Your I Statement will …

…Inject personality into your story…

…Give your storytelling a sense of Identity…

…Infuse your story with a sense ofImmediacy, and…

…Improve your relationship with your audience.

March 2018

Put on a Happy Face

Aug 7, 2016 | Broadcast Interviews, Public Speaking

Before the emoji there was the facial expression. And while there’s no denying the emoji is on trend with the global obsession over social media, the facial expression still ranks as the most powerful tool on the planet to convey ideas and emotions and connect a speaker to an audience.

I’m paying a lot more attention to people’s faces these days. What insights and personality traits are conveyed through facial expressions? What can I learn if I really look closely when a person is speaking to me? How does the face reflect the emotional element of a speaker’s stump speech? What does the face reveal that artfully crafted words often attempt to conceal?  

One writer famously said that the eyes are the mirror of the soul, and many experts believe that the face conveys seven emotions universally recognized around the world: surprise, fear, disgust, contempt, anger, sadness and happiness. Frankly, if the eyes are the mirror of the soul, the face is a megaphone for the heart. One, or perhaps two, of those emotions are actually upbeat, but just think about how often we tend to default to the other five more volatile emotions. The face has great power to move and motivate an audience. Helen of Troy was once described as, “The face that launched a thousand ships.” The beauty conveyed through her face was so compelling that armies of Greek men were inspired to go to war.

There are nearly 2,000 emoji now available to express how we feel, but does a cartoon version of the real thing really cut it? A caricature can’t come close to magnifying the emotion seen in the face, and it’s a one way experience.

I’m on a campaign to revive the smile. The smile is a speaker’s most formidable super power. Think of what a smile can achieve – it’s disarming, it breaks down barriers and strengthens bonds. Sometimes, it’s even kind of sexy. And, a smile is contagious, in a good way. When you smile at your audience, they smile back. Recently I got a seat at a restaurant bar in the Berkshires for a quick meal. The food was regrettable but the bartender’s smile was completely engaging. By the time I paid my bill, I had forgotten about the food and could only remember how welcome she had made me feel.

I work with many speakers who become incredibly serious on stage, often to the detriment of their material and audience. Failure to smile can be attributed to nerves, or just plain forgetfulness. Smiling – and the effective use of facial expressions – takes practice and planning.

Compared to the emoji, a facial expression is old school, but still the best. The face is the great connector. So the next time you’re tempted to use a one-dimensional cartoon to express a complex emotion on social media, get out there, look your audience in the eye and put on a happy face.

You’ve always had the power. It’s the best form of social networking around.

August 2016